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Looking at "Trust" from a different perspective

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"These people would never abandon me."

In an organization, it is very important for people to trust each other. A trust based organization is strong. They say trusting others is an ability. People who were brought up in a difficult environment have a hard time trusting others. On the other hand, people who grew up in an environment where they could trust others, can trust others. Then, what does it mean to trust others?

(1) Reasons why I can trust him/her:

  • I know him/her
  • I like him/her
  • I know the way he/she thinks
  • I know what actions he/she will take
  • I know he/she is not two-faced

(2) Reasons why you were betrayed after trusting him/her:

  • Thinking I am fated with him/her
  • Believing I can trust his/her eyes or facial expression
  • Being attracted to his/her social position
  • Charmed by his/her good sense of humor
  • Assuming that because he/she apologizes often, he/she must be a good person

(3) A person who tend to be trusted:

  • An honest person
  • A person who can't hide things
  • A person who doesn't hesitate to show his/her weaknesses
  • A person who is not too overly social
  • A simple person
  • A person who is always calm and stable

(4) A person who tend not to be trusted:

  • A pretentious person
  • A person who puts on a bold front
  • A person who always makes a good argument and lacks empathy
  • A person who cannot apologize

I have tried to define what is "to trust" and "to be trusted." Human beings have a mix of these characteristics; they have them all to different degrees, and those are hard to hide. If you try to hide them, they would come out eventually. So, the following is the best way to create mutual trust in the order of priority:

  • Avoid having these characteristics stated in (4)
  • Don't be too trusting and avoid betrayed by making the mistakes stated in (2)
  • Don't hesitate to be who you are as stated in (1)
  • Don't hesitate to show your characteristics stated in (3)

Making efforts to continue the above over time should increase mutual trust amongst the people in the organization you are in. Don't trust others too much. It is good to reassess these points occasionally, whether you are doing things right or not, thus allowing mutual-trust to grow.

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